Thanks, black-5 for the link.
Am I a Southern boy or what?
create your own visited states map
or write about it on the open travel guide
Saturday
My Where I Have Been Map.
Thanks, black-5 for the link.
Am I a Southern boy or what?
create your own visited states map
or write about it on the open travel guide
Friday
Open Letter to Mydoom Author
MSNBC - Mydoom threat still high;Microsoft offers reward:
To the guy/gal who wrote the mydoom worm:
Your Mydoom worm has really caused a stir. I would offer you one teesy little suggestion. Make it block SPAM.
If you had made it block spam, whos like spam?, instead of blocking the anti-virus sites, but kept blocking the popup ads, you probably could have sold it, instead of giving it away free and made big bundles of $$$$$$$$
Also it could keep people from going to bad scary evil web places that nobody really has any business going. Such as "howtokillamanwithtoast.com" , "eBay" or "DeanforAmerica.com".
Drop me an email and we'll work out the plan for marketing it! Hope to hear from you soon.
Sincerely,
SpaceMonkey
"In addition to attacking Microsoft and SCO, the new version also tries to block victims from reaching antivirus Web sites. It also blocks ads served by about a dozen advertising network sites, including Ad.Doubleclick.net and ads.Fastclick.net."
To the guy/gal who wrote the mydoom worm:
Your Mydoom worm has really caused a stir. I would offer you one teesy little suggestion. Make it block SPAM.
If you had made it block spam, whos like spam?, instead of blocking the anti-virus sites, but kept blocking the popup ads, you probably could have sold it, instead of giving it away free and made big bundles of $$$$$$$$
Also it could keep people from going to bad scary evil web places that nobody really has any business going. Such as "howtokillamanwithtoast.com" , "eBay" or "DeanforAmerica.com".
Drop me an email and we'll work out the plan for marketing it! Hope to hear from you soon.
Sincerely,
SpaceMonkey
My View On Raising The Minimum Wage
When I was in college I was in a fraternity. Next door to the house was a bar that served lunch during the day. Some of us would meet there for lunch everyday. I always got the burger. They served a really great burger, one you could actually eat every day and not get tired of. We enjoyed eating there and it kind of felt Melrose Placish. We'd laugh and shoot pool and argue about the argument of the day. Then, while we were eating there one day, the owner told us he was not going to be able to serve lunch any more, the restaurant was effectively closing but the bar would operate at night..
'Why?' we all demanded.
Well he explained it all to us, He was having to let his cook go. The one that made the eat-every-day-able hamburger. He told us he couldn't afford to pay him anymore. The minimum wage increase had passed and was going into effect.
My friends and I were out our midday social gathering, I was denied my daily burger, and the cook, a smallish oriental man who spoke no English, but smiled almost constantly, was out of a job.
Raising the minimum wage doesn't make everybody whose making it earn more. Some folks make much less as a result. Some folks aren't affected anymore than having fewer cozy places to relate with the gang.
Some folks just make do with lesser burgers, I STILL miss that burger, the fries (chips for some of you and you know who you are) weren't bad either. I was robbed of a unique simple pleasure by that stupid minimum wage increase.
'Why?' we all demanded.
Well he explained it all to us, He was having to let his cook go. The one that made the eat-every-day-able hamburger. He told us he couldn't afford to pay him anymore. The minimum wage increase had passed and was going into effect.
My friends and I were out our midday social gathering, I was denied my daily burger, and the cook, a smallish oriental man who spoke no English, but smiled almost constantly, was out of a job.
Raising the minimum wage doesn't make everybody whose making it earn more. Some folks make much less as a result. Some folks aren't affected anymore than having fewer cozy places to relate with the gang.
Some folks just make do with lesser burgers, I STILL miss that burger, the fries (chips for some of you and you know who you are) weren't bad either. I was robbed of a unique simple pleasure by that stupid minimum wage increase.
Wednesday
WWAFD? What Would Al Franken Do? or Violence is the answer.
When somebody is talking that you want to hear and then some body else is talking at the same time and you don't care to listen to them. What to do, what to do? Al Franken's answer? Sneak up behind and as nonviolently and in the most gentle and free speech protecting way you can bodyslam them. According to the NYPost article, he wasn't hurt, that is, Franken wasn't hurt. Strangely no word on the victim's/heckler's health status. Nor was there any mention of any Franken arrest for assault. Probably has a license to bodyslam or something similar.
UPDATE: Fake Quote of Stuart Smalley "I'm good enough, and I'm smart enough and doggonnit people like you need to shut up before I bodyslam you." - I crack myself up
UPDATE: Fake Quote of Stuart Smalley "I'm good enough, and I'm smart enough and doggonnit people like you need to shut up before I bodyslam you." - I crack myself up
Tuesday
The Oracle of Bacon at Virginia
According to The Oracle of Bacon at Virginia, I am 3 degrees from Kevin Bacon.
"The Oracle says: Steven Seagal has a Bacon number of 2.
Steven Seagal was in Marked for Death (1990) with Keith (I) David
Keith (I) David was in Novocaine (2001) with Kevin Bacon "
How am I three degrees from the Baconator you might ask? And ask you might. I was an extra in Under Seige with Steven Seagal, which was filmed here in town.
And 1 (me to Steven) + 2 (Steven to Kevin) = *3.
Where Am I? I was a sailor in the scene where the Chinook helicopter bringing the band/terrorists landed on the deck of the USS Missouri. I am kneeling then standing just to the other side of Gary Busey as he stands from kneeling to approach the chopper. You can just barely see my profile. No autographs, please.
What's YOUR Bacon number?
UPDATE: Thanks to Mike The Marine, who points out newly uncovered (and fomerly overlooked by me ) truths from the Oracle Of Bacon. Mainly he points out
"Tommy Lee Jones was in JFK (1991) with Kevin Bacon" which gives me a Bacon number of (drum roll) **2. I couldn't recall his (Tommy Lee Jones') name when I was conjuring the previous version of thissteaming pile thought provoking and pithy post. By the way, Mr Jones is quite an imposing character in person. A glare from him sent me into a puddle in order to get my bony self out of his way, one day on the set.
UPDATE2: I'm 2 degrees from Algore as well. Since he was Mr Jones' roommate in college. Ewwww, I regret knowing this.
*in your FACE, 4 degrees of Kevin Bacon people.
**in my FACE, Me from earlier today and...in your FACE, 3 degrees of Kevin Bacon people.
"The Oracle says: Steven Seagal has a Bacon number of 2.
Steven Seagal was in Marked for Death (1990) with Keith (I) David
Keith (I) David was in Novocaine (2001) with Kevin Bacon "
How am I three degrees from the Baconator you might ask? And ask you might. I was an extra in Under Seige with Steven Seagal, which was filmed here in town.
And 1 (me to Steven) + 2 (Steven to Kevin) = *3.
Where Am I? I was a sailor in the scene where the Chinook helicopter bringing the band/terrorists landed on the deck of the USS Missouri. I am kneeling then standing just to the other side of Gary Busey as he stands from kneeling to approach the chopper. You can just barely see my profile. No autographs, please.
What's YOUR Bacon number?
UPDATE: Thanks to Mike The Marine, who points out newly uncovered (and fomerly overlooked by me ) truths from the Oracle Of Bacon. Mainly he points out
"Tommy Lee Jones was in JFK (1991) with Kevin Bacon" which gives me a Bacon number of (drum roll) **2. I couldn't recall his (Tommy Lee Jones') name when I was conjuring the previous version of this
UPDATE2: I'm 2 degrees from Algore as well. Since he was Mr Jones' roommate in college. Ewwww, I regret knowing this.
*in your FACE, 4 degrees of Kevin Bacon people.
**in my FACE, Me from earlier today and...in your FACE, 3 degrees of Kevin Bacon people.
Monday
Miller's New Show Starts Tonight
My Way News:Dennis Miller to Give Bush a Free Pass
My favorite part of his new show?
"And a monkey."
"You read that right. Miller wanted a simian presence, believing a monkey occasionally scampering across the studio floor will keep both guests and viewers on their toes, he said."
Well, who wouldn't like a monkey around? Evolutionist's would likely consider the monkey a member of the family. Creationists would consider the monkey one of God's wonderful creatures. All the bases are covered. Briilliant.
I wonder if the Flying Space variety would be acceptable for the show. Hmmmmm, anybody know Mr. Miller's email?
Thanks to the Poliblogger for the the link
My favorite part of his new show?
"And a monkey."
"You read that right. Miller wanted a simian presence, believing a monkey occasionally scampering across the studio floor will keep both guests and viewers on their toes, he said."
Well, who wouldn't like a monkey around? Evolutionist's would likely consider the monkey a member of the family. Creationists would consider the monkey one of God's wonderful creatures. All the bases are covered. Briilliant.
I wonder if the Flying Space variety would be acceptable for the show. Hmmmmm, anybody know Mr. Miller's email?
Thanks to the Poliblogger for the the link
Sunday
Syndicated
Ok, I've got an xml feed now. I hope you're happy. Shane.
Update: The xml url is on the Sidebar on the left, no, your other left. Thanks for pointing that out Dan.
Update: The xml url is on the Sidebar on the left, no, your other left. Thanks for pointing that out Dan.
Saturday
Hey Moviemakers, Cut That CursingBleep Out.
Since DVD's usually have multiple sound tracks, usu. adding French or Spanish language dubs.
Why not have a PG-Rated language version on there too? That would be cool. Hey, for that matter, why not have a theatre release which is also the TV edit? They are going to do it anyway when it finally goes on TV, why not increase their potential ticket buying viewerbase? I don't know, seems logical to me. Guess I'm just ahead of my time.
Why not have a PG-Rated language version on there too? That would be cool. Hey, for that matter, why not have a theatre release which is also the TV edit? They are going to do it anyway when it finally goes on TV, why not increase their potential ticket buying viewerbase? I don't know, seems logical to me. Guess I'm just ahead of my time.
Overtoasted? Maybe
If you think I am an overtoasted, toast talker talkin' about toast too much, look at this toasty post in the poliblog. Sheesh.
Really, I'm ONLY kidding. Toast is the meme of the future!! Toast, anyone?
Really, I'm ONLY kidding. Toast is the meme of the future!! Toast, anyone?
Friday
It's Alive?
Spirit Rover Sending Data Again, Status Unclear
The Spirit Rover finally woke up this morning, still a little groggy, ate a balanced breakfast of sunlight and dry, white toast during a quick interview with Mission Control and headed off to explore. NASA and JPL issued a statement indicating a case of Martian Rover/Lander Flu (MRLF) has been deemed to be the cause of yesterday's sleep-in. MRLF or "MeRLFFFF' as the slang goes around among those in the 'know' at Mission Control is also the suspected cause of death for the ESA's 'Beagle 2' Lander, being smaller, punier, and linked to cheese eating surrender monkeys who prefer croissants to toast.
Spirit was visibly upset during the breakfast interview at comparison of it's unintelligible gibberish quasicommunications with Howard "Coward Scream" Dean's similar unintelligible gibberish. Defending himself in fashion that merits his name, Spirit said "Hey, at least I was sick and fevered. You are gonna make silly psycho sounds when you feel all endless loopy in the CPU like I was yesterday, but I'm all better now, The other guy? He needs to add "the factory" to the list of places he's gonna go. His 'captain insano' emotion chip clearly needs replacing, the one he's using is toast, man.......Angry dry white toast." Then, obviously losing interest in the interview and rolling away Spirit exclaimed, 'OOOH, LOOK! A MARS ROCK, another pretty, pretty MARS ROCK. TOASTY"
The Spirit Rover finally woke up this morning, still a little groggy, ate a balanced breakfast of sunlight and dry, white toast during a quick interview with Mission Control and headed off to explore. NASA and JPL issued a statement indicating a case of Martian Rover/Lander Flu (MRLF) has been deemed to be the cause of yesterday's sleep-in. MRLF or "MeRLFFFF' as the slang goes around among those in the 'know' at Mission Control is also the suspected cause of death for the ESA's 'Beagle 2' Lander, being smaller, punier, and linked to cheese eating surrender monkeys who prefer croissants to toast.
Spirit was visibly upset during the breakfast interview at comparison of it's unintelligible gibberish quasicommunications with Howard "Coward Scream" Dean's similar unintelligible gibberish. Defending himself in fashion that merits his name, Spirit said "Hey, at least I was sick and fevered. You are gonna make silly psycho sounds when you feel all endless loopy in the CPU like I was yesterday, but I'm all better now, The other guy? He needs to add "the factory" to the list of places he's gonna go. His 'captain insano' emotion chip clearly needs replacing, the one he's using is toast, man.......Angry dry white toast." Then, obviously losing interest in the interview and rolling away Spirit exclaimed, 'OOOH, LOOK! A MARS ROCK, another pretty, pretty MARS ROCK. TOASTY"
Scientist Makes Claim that DEAN is actually a "PROBE FROM MARS"
Sutter's Mill USA - Respected Alienprobologist, Dr Xeno Milquetoast Dds, PhD, LGM. has made the announcement that DEAN is actually a "PROBE FROM MARS"
Milquetoast upon remembering how in The War of the Worlds the Martian attackers walked around killing humans everywhere with their heat rays, then all got sick and died because of earth bacteria, the idea struck him like a heat ray.
Milquetoast says that the Spirit Rover, possibly the Beagle II and other failed landers have all been affected by Martian microbes gumming up the works in a similar fashion. Milquetoast defines this term as when works get all gummy like when microbes get in them.
Milquetoast says "Missions to land on Mars have all fallen silent due to Martian microbe-caused gummy works. It's a plague. We've probing them, they are probing us back and I have the proof!''
"Deans incessant ranting, not quite human emotional response, expressions, and reaction and the otherworldly screech, desire for world domination are clear indicators that he's a alien presence in the form of an almost human like replicant, y'know like in Blade Runner, but without the expiration date, sort of War Of The World Martian Attack Thingy Mark II. Maybe he's not completely gummed up yet but his works are DEFINITELY getting gummier. Gummy to the point of psychotic episodes."
Milquetoast observes, "He makes little to no sense. Did you notice the similarity between his screech and the Mars Rover current unintelligible gibberish?"
Milquetoast adds in a serious tone, "Also note how he jabs his 'finger' out as though sampling the earth air with a probe-tool."
"Note also how he's always taking his coat off and rolling up his sleeves. Earth is a veritable oven compared to Mars, so of course he's gonna be taking off layers to keep his heat ray from overheating and killing the electorate, before he's ready for that phase of his plan, that is."
"Why do you think he keeps his records as Governor of Vermont sealed? The first line of his Governor's Journal probably reads 'I now am leader a land region the earth beings call 'Vermont', The earth beings are easy to trick but not so easy to emulate. After I overthrow their world power, the 'U.S.A.', they will be fun to toast with my heat ray. I do so miss the probe factory back on Mars where I was built. Got to go, works feeling gummy, yeeeeahrrg.'"
"Dean's a Martian probe, that's all there is to it. You've been warned, don't blame me when he heat rays all over New Hampshire or Connecticut or Texas or.....Well, you get the point."
This Fake News is brought to you by: Milquetoast Anti-Heat Ray Clothing. 'Remember, friends, You won't get toasted if you're wearing Milquetoast'
Milquetoast upon remembering how in The War of the Worlds the Martian attackers walked around killing humans everywhere with their heat rays, then all got sick and died because of earth bacteria, the idea struck him like a heat ray.
Milquetoast says that the Spirit Rover, possibly the Beagle II and other failed landers have all been affected by Martian microbes gumming up the works in a similar fashion. Milquetoast defines this term as when works get all gummy like when microbes get in them.
Milquetoast says "Missions to land on Mars have all fallen silent due to Martian microbe-caused gummy works. It's a plague. We've probing them, they are probing us back and I have the proof!''
"Deans incessant ranting, not quite human emotional response, expressions, and reaction and the otherworldly screech, desire for world domination are clear indicators that he's a alien presence in the form of an almost human like replicant, y'know like in Blade Runner, but without the expiration date, sort of War Of The World Martian Attack Thingy Mark II. Maybe he's not completely gummed up yet but his works are DEFINITELY getting gummier. Gummy to the point of psychotic episodes."
Milquetoast observes, "He makes little to no sense. Did you notice the similarity between his screech and the Mars Rover current unintelligible gibberish?"
Milquetoast adds in a serious tone, "Also note how he jabs his 'finger' out as though sampling the earth air with a probe-tool."
"Note also how he's always taking his coat off and rolling up his sleeves. Earth is a veritable oven compared to Mars, so of course he's gonna be taking off layers to keep his heat ray from overheating and killing the electorate, before he's ready for that phase of his plan, that is."
"Why do you think he keeps his records as Governor of Vermont sealed? The first line of his Governor's Journal probably reads 'I now am leader a land region the earth beings call 'Vermont', The earth beings are easy to trick but not so easy to emulate. After I overthrow their world power, the 'U.S.A.', they will be fun to toast with my heat ray. I do so miss the probe factory back on Mars where I was built. Got to go, works feeling gummy, yeeeeahrrg.'"
"Dean's a Martian probe, that's all there is to it. You've been warned, don't blame me when he heat rays all over New Hampshire or Connecticut or Texas or.....Well, you get the point."
This Fake News is brought to you by: Milquetoast Anti-Heat Ray Clothing. 'Remember, friends, You won't get toasted if you're wearing Milquetoast'
Thursday
The Krauts had it wrong. We Don't Got Him After All
Reuters | Latest Financial News / Full News Coverage: "U.S. Official: No Truth to Rumor Bin Laden Captured "
Well that euphoria was a short lived ~18 minutes
*Sigh* Still, I think I scooped the blogiverse on the 'bin Laden captured' unfounded rumor meme..
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Well that euphoria was a short lived ~18 minutes
*Sigh* Still, I think I scooped the blogiverse on the 'bin Laden captured' unfounded rumor meme..
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
UPI: bin Laden captured???
Interest!ALERT: Quality Content: "Report: bin Laden held
BERLIN, Jan. 22 (UPI) -- Al-Qaida leader Osama bin Laden has been captured, Germany's Die Welt newspaper reported Thursday.
If this is true....heh heh WOW.
Update: Die Welt has this relevant looking breaking news item. "USA dementieren Gerücht über Festnahme Osama bin Ladens" but I dont read German and there nothing else there ,no link, no nothing, just a B&W graphic of an exclamation point.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
BERLIN, Jan. 22 (UPI) -- Al-Qaida leader Osama bin Laden has been captured, Germany's Die Welt newspaper reported Thursday.
If this is true....heh heh WOW.
Update: Die Welt has this relevant looking breaking news item. "USA dementieren Gerücht über Festnahme Osama bin Ladens" but I dont read German and there nothing else there ,no link, no nothing, just a B&W graphic of an exclamation point.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Wednesday
Dean's Plan For Dominating Zorhod 4 of the Trendax Cluster
I'm sure everyone heard Dr. Dean's rousing redfaced litany of states, nations, planets, globular clusters and extradimensional realms he will crush under his jackboots stylish loafers on his path to Supreme Dark Overlord of the Universe. Then he cleared his throat and coughed up 40 lbs of pure evil in the process.
Throat clearing and evil phlegm gurgling aside. Sounds like a well thought out and logical plan. I will sum it up if I may in a single word.
WIN!
With a fool-proof plan like that, he can't lose. It's utter genius! Only the Dr could come up with a plan like that.
One has to wonder though, why didn't he come up with that plan BEFORE the Iowa caucus. Ahh yes, the ways of the Dean are a mystery. But the news is great for all you Deanfans out there, since victory is assured, you can all sleep well in your biopods. Resistance is futile and pangalactic triumph is within your grasp. The trip down gumdrop lane has begun and won't end till the Dean finds the magic num num tree. Tralahlah lahlah treleelee leelee, wubba wubba.
Zoink.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Throat clearing and evil phlegm gurgling aside. Sounds like a well thought out and logical plan. I will sum it up if I may in a single word.
WIN!
With a fool-proof plan like that, he can't lose. It's utter genius! Only the Dr could come up with a plan like that.
One has to wonder though, why didn't he come up with that plan BEFORE the Iowa caucus. Ahh yes, the ways of the Dean are a mystery. But the news is great for all you Deanfans out there, since victory is assured, you can all sleep well in your biopods. Resistance is futile and pangalactic triumph is within your grasp. The trip down gumdrop lane has begun and won't end till the Dean finds the magic num num tree. Tralahlah lahlah treleelee leelee, wubba wubba.
Zoink.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Tuesday
Dean Blames Third-Place Finish on Attacks
My Way News: Dean Blames Third-Place Finish on Attacks
"Dean blamed the loss on attacks he suffered as the one-time front-runner. His rivals pummeled him with criticism, saying he didn't have the foreign policy experience or temperament to lead the country."
It was attacks alright, just not the ones he's thinking.
"Dean blamed the loss on attacks he suffered as the one-time front-runner. His rivals pummeled him with criticism, saying he didn't have the foreign policy experience or temperament to lead the country."
It was attacks alright, just not the ones he's thinking.
Dude, where's my sense?
COURTTV.COM - PEOPLE - Man tosses marijuana into security tray while going through metal detector
After making bail and securing a fresh stash, he *allegedly was one of the 2 doofs who voted for Kucinich.
As he left the caucus, he was *allegedly quoted as saying 'Whoa, I could really go for some pie'
* I am so totally making this up
After making bail and securing a fresh stash, he *allegedly was one of the 2 doofs who voted for Kucinich.
As he left the caucus, he was *allegedly quoted as saying 'Whoa, I could really go for some pie'
* I am so totally making this up
RE: Gephardt
I wonder if the author of the miserable failure line feels like a victim of irony now.
I wonder.....
Unfortunately for the poor guy his name and the term will be joined in the memories of this generation moreso than the way he intended.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
I wonder.....
Unfortunately for the poor guy his name and the term will be joined in the memories of this generation moreso than the way he intended.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Monday
Notice Anything?
Whew! Finished the new layout, been a long time coming. Once again, thanks are due to Shane.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
How was your weekend?
'How was your weekend?', a coworker asked as we fought the brisk wind to enter the office building in which we are both 'cubed'.
'O-kay' I said after a brief moments pause and stepped through the door.
'Uh-oh that doesn't sound good' he said as we continued down the hall.
'Why do you say that?' I replied.
'The way you said "okay" sounds like you had a bad weekend' he answered as he opened and stepped through the door to the IT cubopolis we both call 'work'.
Following him in, I offered 'Well, I didn't discover a transdimensional portal in my closet or anything this weekend and I didn't invent a NEW meat flavored beverage. I just had a normal quiet weekend'
Then over the cube wall we hear 'Oh brother, not again with the meat flavored beverages'
I chuckle inwardly. They hate it when I mention the meat flavored beverages. They'll see, they'll see.
Then I stopped chuckling.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
'O-kay' I said after a brief moments pause and stepped through the door.
'Uh-oh that doesn't sound good' he said as we continued down the hall.
'Why do you say that?' I replied.
'The way you said "okay" sounds like you had a bad weekend' he answered as he opened and stepped through the door to the IT cubopolis we both call 'work'.
Following him in, I offered 'Well, I didn't discover a transdimensional portal in my closet or anything this weekend and I didn't invent a NEW meat flavored beverage. I just had a normal quiet weekend'
Then over the cube wall we hear 'Oh brother, not again with the meat flavored beverages'
I chuckle inwardly. They hate it when I mention the meat flavored beverages. They'll see, they'll see.
Then I stopped chuckling.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Working on a holiday
Boy, don't ya LOVE working on a day when most folks are off? Really, there they are all sleeping late, wearing pajamas all day and watching the soaps and I have the unrelenting pleasure of going to the office to work. BooYah! Nothing like it, I tell ya. Nothing at all. So if you are at home reading this in your jammies and bunny slippers, then I have this to say to you
"NEENER-NEENER-NEENER, YOU-had-to-STAY-home and-I-GOT-to-WER-erk. HAha-haHAha!"
I'm only laughing to keep from crying.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
"NEENER-NEENER-NEENER, YOU-had-to-STAY-home and-I-GOT-to-WER-erk. HAha-haHAha!"
I'm only laughing to keep from crying.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Saturday
Ever Wonder?
Ever wonder how the cheese got added to broccoli to make broccoli and cheese? I do. It's not that obvious an addition. By itself broccoli, well, sucks. But add cheese and it transforms into a veritible dessert among vegetable dishes. I never tried it when I was a kid, when I think about that I reall give myself a swft hard mental kick because of all the 'B&C' I cheated myself out of by not trying it.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Thursday
The Cluetrain, get aboard
Anybody who hasn't read this yet, where have you been?
I just read it myself, and come to think of it where have I been?
An Idea whose time has come, you should read the Cluetrain Manifesto
A parody whose time has come of an idea whose time.... oh just READ it already! The Gluetrain Mainfesto
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
I just read it myself, and come to think of it where have I been?
An Idea whose time has come, you should read the Cluetrain Manifesto
A parody whose time has come of an idea whose time.... oh just READ it already! The Gluetrain Mainfesto
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Wednesday
Thanks Shane
Thanks to Shane Blake over at Kudzu for resolving my blog rendering problem. He's a bright one that Shane.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
In the mail bag
Dear XXXX,
There is a big effort underway by supporters of homosexual marriage to keep President Bush from promoting a constitutional amendment defining marriage as being between one man and one woman.
Send your letter urging the President to support a federal marriage amendment.
Homosexual leaders have openly bragged about the influence they have with staff members at the White House. Senator Feingold of Wisconsin has publicly stated that he will lead the charge for homosexual marriage.
Senators and Congressmen willing to work for passage of a constitutional amendment tell us they are waiting on the President to act.
I urge you to let President Bush know you stand with him in opposing homosexual marriage. Please donÂ’t let those supporters of homosexual marriage in the White House be the only voice the President hears.
Send the letter of encouragement to the President now. Let him know you stand with him. It would send a powerful and encouraging note to the President to hear from millions of Americans. Please send your email now.
And be sure to forward this request to at least one friend.
Sincerely,
Don
Donald E. Wildmon, Founder and Chairman
American Family Association
P.S. Please forward this email to at least one friend.
I don't generally forward emails, and I don't intend to start now, I figure this is as close as I can allow. How this organization got my email is a mystery but they sure hit their target demographic here at the Flying Space Monkey Chronicles. I definitely support protecting the family as an institution. I am not afraid of gays, don't hate them or anything like that but I am afraid of wishing them Godspeed as would be the case of legalizing gay marriage. How strongly do I feel in this regard?
Well........how's this?
I can honestly say I would support the secession of the state I live in if gay marriage were be made legal. It wouldn't be the first time we'd seceded. But it think this time we could make it stick. I am definitely sending my letter to the pres. on this but I'm also seriously thinking about establishment of the Free State Of Alabama in event of the other. I will say more on this, just not now.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
There is a big effort underway by supporters of homosexual marriage to keep President Bush from promoting a constitutional amendment defining marriage as being between one man and one woman.
Send your letter urging the President to support a federal marriage amendment.
Homosexual leaders have openly bragged about the influence they have with staff members at the White House. Senator Feingold of Wisconsin has publicly stated that he will lead the charge for homosexual marriage.
Senators and Congressmen willing to work for passage of a constitutional amendment tell us they are waiting on the President to act.
I urge you to let President Bush know you stand with him in opposing homosexual marriage. Please donÂ’t let those supporters of homosexual marriage in the White House be the only voice the President hears.
Send the letter of encouragement to the President now. Let him know you stand with him. It would send a powerful and encouraging note to the President to hear from millions of Americans. Please send your email now.
And be sure to forward this request to at least one friend.
Sincerely,
Don
Donald E. Wildmon, Founder and Chairman
American Family Association
P.S. Please forward this email to at least one friend.
I don't generally forward emails, and I don't intend to start now, I figure this is as close as I can allow. How this organization got my email is a mystery but they sure hit their target demographic here at the Flying Space Monkey Chronicles. I definitely support protecting the family as an institution. I am not afraid of gays, don't hate them or anything like that but I am afraid of wishing them Godspeed as would be the case of legalizing gay marriage. How strongly do I feel in this regard?
Well........how's this?
I can honestly say I would support the secession of the state I live in if gay marriage were be made legal. It wouldn't be the first time we'd seceded. But it think this time we could make it stick. I am definitely sending my letter to the pres. on this but I'm also seriously thinking about establishment of the Free State Of Alabama in event of the other. I will say more on this, just not now.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Monday
Michael "Miserable Failure" Moore
I'm not sure we should google bomb Michael "Miserable Failure" Moore by putting Michael "Miserable Failure" Moore on our blogs and so forth, I mean his entire, huge body of work is obviously satire of satire. I mean c'mon, have you seen any of it? Surely nobody could in his right mind think the way his little 'entertainments' purport him to. I think, one "Miserable Failure" here is the general tendency to think people mean what they say.
"Michael Moore" needs everyone to give him a break.
I suggest we all complain to Mr. Beck about this.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
"Michael Moore" needs everyone to give him a break.
I suggest we all complain to Mr. Beck about this.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Saturday
Sen. Harkin Endorses Dean Apparently Demonstrates Poor Judgment
FOXNews.com - Politics - Sen. Harkin Endorses Dean: "'This year, we have an exceptionally strong field of candidates. Each one is a talented, well-qualified Democrat who would be a vast improvement over the current occupant of the White House." Does Harken not know that neither Wesley Clark nor Al Sharpton have ever held an elected office." I like and respect each one of them,' Harkin said to cheers at Dean's headquarters in Des Moines." Does Harken not know that Al Sharpton has spent time in Jail.
"The backing of Harkin, who ran for president in 1992 but lost in the primaries to Bill Clinton, comes as Dean confronts a barrage of criticism." So Harkin was beaten by Clinton in 1992. Gore was defeated by Bush in 2000. Bradley, in turn, was struck down by Gore in 2000. Dean's GOT to be happy with that many "winners" endorsing him.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
"The backing of Harkin, who ran for president in 1992 but lost in the primaries to Bill Clinton, comes as Dean confronts a barrage of criticism." So Harkin was beaten by Clinton in 1992. Gore was defeated by Bush in 2000. Bradley, in turn, was struck down by Gore in 2000. Dean's GOT to be happy with that many "winners" endorsing him.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Friday
Nothing from the Arabs?
In response to this story on the BBC
Mr Free Market over in the UK had this to say regarding this Brit,Robert Kilroy-Silk , being fired for writing an article titled "We Owe the Arabs Nothing".
An English Man over in his UK castle had this to say in Mr Kilroy-Silk's defense as well.
I agree the guy shouldn't have been fired for what he said, and what he said mainly was can anyone think of any contribution to humanity the Arabs have made? He couldn't but I did or think I did anyway. I took a quick run through my memory banks and came up with a few thoughts.
What about um...Algebra? I am pretty sure about that one.
Arabic numerals? I know they invented that one also.
Lawrence of Arabia? Ok they didn't give us him but somebody(not Arabs I think) made a pretty cool movie about him anyway,
Arabian Horses? Well at least they are named after the region.
Civilization? At least it was supposedly started in that Area.
I know it been a while since they came up with the ones they did come up with but we are still using some of them.
It's more than nothing. A fair bit more. But no reason to can someone for disagreeing with me on this or the Arabs.
UPDATE: Mr Kilroy-Silk wasn't speaking of historical contribution. He was actually asking what current contribution do they make? Other than a few good blogs, well, Ok he's got me there.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Mr Free Market over in the UK had this to say regarding this Brit,Robert Kilroy-Silk , being fired for writing an article titled "We Owe the Arabs Nothing".
An English Man over in his UK castle had this to say in Mr Kilroy-Silk's defense as well.
I agree the guy shouldn't have been fired for what he said, and what he said mainly was can anyone think of any contribution to humanity the Arabs have made? He couldn't but I did or think I did anyway. I took a quick run through my memory banks and came up with a few thoughts.
What about um...Algebra? I am pretty sure about that one.
Arabic numerals? I know they invented that one also.
Lawrence of Arabia? Ok they didn't give us him but somebody(not Arabs I think) made a pretty cool movie about him anyway,
Arabian Horses? Well at least they are named after the region.
Civilization? At least it was supposedly started in that Area.
I know it been a while since they came up with the ones they did come up with but we are still using some of them.
It's more than nothing. A fair bit more. But no reason to can someone for disagreeing with me on this or the Arabs.
UPDATE: Mr Kilroy-Silk wasn't speaking of historical contribution. He was actually asking what current contribution do they make? Other than a few good blogs, well, Ok he's got me there.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
To the Moon Alice, and This Time to Stay.
FOXNews.com - Politics - Bush to Announce New Missions to Moon, Mars
People have been on the moon during my lifetime, I am happy to say, but you know what? I only didn't know it at the time being in diapers and all. But I always felt sorta cheated that it didn't happen again after I started talking, going potty, and forming permanent memories as well as forming permanent memories about talking about going potty.
If we go back in the next 10 years, I will be one ecstatic monkey let me tell you. space monkey that is. I am pretty thrilled just knowing it's being seriously considered. Because we need know people are talking about giving our kids a ride to go potty up there. And what a permanent memory that will be.
People have been on the moon during my lifetime, I am happy to say, but you know what? I only didn't know it at the time being in diapers and all. But I always felt sorta cheated that it didn't happen again after I started talking, going potty, and forming permanent memories as well as forming permanent memories about talking about going potty.
If we go back in the next 10 years, I will be one ecstatic monkey let me tell you. space monkey that is. I am pretty thrilled just knowing it's being seriously considered. Because we need know people are talking about giving our kids a ride to go potty up there. And what a permanent memory that will be.
Wednesday
Arrrrrgggghhhhh!!
I posted a bunch of, trust me on this one, great comments (y'know, I alllll-most made that a capital G great but they really weren't THAT great) on other blogs about that obvious satire piece, the S factor. And then was going to link to them here on the monkey. And show you, gentle reader, my acerbic wit and wow you with my wonderful witterly wittastic witwomping.
And then, like a middle earth army of the dead, the PHB walks by, I suavely, coolly and immediately go into utter, complete, panic mode and do a quick close all on all my precious, precious explorer instances and my precious comments go into the ether. The blood in my ears thundered like a herd of mustangs.
Here it is hours later, I've been looking, looking, looking and looking and haven't found a single bleeping blog I commented on regarding that load of tripe and now I'm sitting here fuming and yes, wondering what tripe tastes like and fuming some more and this load of tripe is all I can come up with.
Thanks for coming by anyway, both of you.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
And then, like a middle earth army of the dead, the PHB walks by, I suavely, coolly and immediately go into utter, complete, panic mode and do a quick close all on all my precious, precious explorer instances and my precious comments go
Here it is hours later, I've been looking, looking, looking and looking and haven't found a single bleeping blog I commented on regarding that load of tripe and now I'm sitting here fuming and yes, wondering what tripe tastes like and fuming some more and this load of tripe is all I can come up with.
Thanks for coming by anyway, both of you.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Hmmm maybe a catchy verbal description of a pie chart would have been better - Satire Alert
Newsday.com: Kucinich 'Shows' Pie Chart on Radio Debate
Answering his critics, Kucinich said he will display the pie chart on his refrigerator at home so any who missed it on NPR will have ample opportunity to examine at their leisure.
Kucinich has further asked that when his campaign commercials are aired, for anyone who might be watching to cover up if they happen to be dressing or are undressed when the commercials air. He said that people on TV watching him in the privacy of his own home has always gave him the 'heeby jeebies' and he wants to take steps to avoid a scandal involving any suggestion he's watching anyone inappropriately. Kucinich then challenged the ACLU to looked into this violation of privacy. Further he vowed to 'work the system from the inside' if he's elected in 2004.
Other bright ideas include a program to encourage the dead to vote more. Registration drives which are taking place in cemeteries throughout Iowa and New Hampshire, in an ongoing under-the-grassroots movement. Kucinich said 'Turnout to the events has been lower than I'd expected. Considering the fact that voter turnout among of the dead is only significant in states of Illinois and Louisiana and practically nonexistant everywhere else, if we can get just one, just one of the deceased to vote in the upcoming primary, that wouldn't have otherwise, I will consider the effort to have been effective.'
Disclaimer: The content of this post should in no way be construed as factual. Unless the scenes, conversations and events I am depicting in satirical work have actually occured and I didn't know it. If that turns out to be the case then, you read it here first.
Answering his critics, Kucinich said he will display the pie chart on his refrigerator at home so any who missed it on NPR will have ample opportunity to examine at their leisure.
Kucinich has further asked that when his campaign commercials are aired, for anyone who might be watching to cover up if they happen to be dressing or are undressed when the commercials air. He said that people on TV watching him in the privacy of his own home has always gave him the 'heeby jeebies' and he wants to take steps to avoid a scandal involving any suggestion he's watching anyone inappropriately. Kucinich then challenged the ACLU to looked into this violation of privacy. Further he vowed to 'work the system from the inside' if he's elected in 2004.
Other bright ideas include a program to encourage the dead to vote more. Registration drives which are taking place in cemeteries throughout Iowa and New Hampshire, in an ongoing under-the-grassroots movement. Kucinich said 'Turnout to the events has been lower than I'd expected. Considering the fact that voter turnout among of the dead is only significant in states of Illinois and Louisiana and practically nonexistant everywhere else, if we can get just one, just one of the deceased to vote in the upcoming primary, that wouldn't have otherwise, I will consider the effort to have been effective.'
Disclaimer: The content of this post should in no way be construed as factual. Unless the scenes, conversations and events I am depicting in satirical work have actually occured and I didn't know it. If that turns out to be the case then, you read it here first.
Tuesday
Things I've discovered
If you claim you bought a lottery ticket and then lost it, you can sue the lottery commission to withhold the money from the legal owner when they come forward to claim it.
If you are five foot eight inches tall and you get former New York Knicks Players/former New Jersey Senators to endorse your presidential candidacy, you stand beside them for the briefest,tiniest period of time possible, they will still stoop down to show how much shorter you are.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
If you are five foot eight inches tall and you get former New York Knicks Players/former New Jersey Senators to endorse your presidential candidacy, you stand beside them for the briefest,tiniest period of time possible, they will still stoop down to show how much shorter you are.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Monday
Good news lefties
The American Civil Liberties Union of Pennsylvania is hiring!
I was afraid to click to find out what exactly a "Legal Intake" is.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!! Faaarrrr away from that one.
I was afraid to click to find out what exactly a "Legal Intake" is.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!! Faaarrrr away from that one.
!
!,?.'-:;/
Strange, how limited our punctuation is.
Strange, how little there seems to me to say about that.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Strange, how limited our punctuation is.
Strange, how little there seems to me to say about that.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Friday
Ignorance Abated
My impatience finally overcame my laziness, as a result I overcame my ignorance by finally looking the whole syndication thing up. I understand how, I've seen it done, I just don't understand completely why.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Showing my ignorance
Like you (probably) I read a lot of blogs on a daily basis.
I have noticed something on a lot of blogs
Your blog (probably) has something like this on it.
Syndicate this site (XML)
this is usu. linked to a file with an .rdf extension.
I know I could (probably) look this up some where on a blog about blogging and get the answer But I'll let you have YOUR say as to what this means and if you know of any site that is syndicated (whatever that means) I'm in the dark on this one. BTW I do know what xml is.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
I have noticed something on a lot of blogs
Your blog (probably) has something like this on it.
Syndicate this site (XML)
this is usu. linked to a file with an .rdf extension.
I know I could (probably) look this up some where on a blog about blogging and get the answer But I'll let you have YOUR say as to what this means and if you know of any site that is syndicated (whatever that means) I'm in the dark on this one. BTW I do know what xml is.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Dean Update
Dean touts a 'Jesus strategy' - The Washington Times: Nation/Politics
Dean has announced he plans to mention God and Jesus when he tours the south.
I wonder, why make such an announcement? Does he really think we Southerners are such yokels that we can't read between the lines of announcements like 'Dean has announced he plans to mention God and Jesus when he tours the south' and see Dean has announced he thinks Southerners are stupid and will follow blindly if someone pays lipservice to God and Jesus when he tours the south..
When he plans to tour Utah will he announce he is a follower of Joseph Smith?
When he speaks to an atheists club will he announce he thinks all religion is a bunch of hooey but wink, wink, nudge, nudge he's got them religious Christian Southern morons roped in, just play along?
Time will tell, But announcing to the effect of 'Hey, Southerners like that God and Jesus stuff, I'm gonna spread that and I think they'll fall for it', is foolishness on a grand scale.
What do you think?
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Dean has announced he plans to mention God and Jesus when he tours the south.
I wonder, why make such an announcement? Does he really think we Southerners are such yokels that we can't read between the lines of announcements like 'Dean has announced he plans to mention God and Jesus when he tours the south' and see Dean has announced he thinks Southerners are stupid and will follow blindly if someone pays lipservice to God and Jesus when he tours the south..
When he plans to tour Utah will he announce he is a follower of Joseph Smith?
When he speaks to an atheists club will he announce he thinks all religion is a bunch of hooey but wink, wink, nudge, nudge he's got them religious Christian Southern morons roped in, just play along?
Time will tell, But announcing to the effect of 'Hey, Southerners like that God and Jesus stuff, I'm gonna spread that and I think they'll fall for it', is foolishness on a grand scale.
What do you think?
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Thursday
Hoppy Gnu Ear!!!!
2004
Hope you and yours have a safe and prosperous new year. And a big cheery THANK YOU to the police and armed forces that saw to it no terror attacks took place overnight. As well as all the city state and federal officals who lost no telling how much sleep planning security for the night's celebratory events. It was a good job all around and the best news was no news.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Hope you and yours have a safe and prosperous new year. And a big cheery THANK YOU to the police and armed forces that saw to it no terror attacks took place overnight. As well as all the city state and federal officals who lost no telling how much sleep planning security for the night's celebratory events. It was a good job all around and the best news was no news.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
Gem
"Tell me and I forget, teach me, and I may remember, involve me and I learn." -- Benjamin Franklin
There's something to that.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
There's something to that.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
DNS woes
Can't see my own blog because some DNS goofup according to blogger. More reason to get my own domain I guess.
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
SpaceMonkey AWAAAAAAY!!!!
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