2/3/2004-- Europeans want to send humans to Mars but won't. The European Space Agency has announced they want to start a manned space program with the end result being humans on Mars. But they say "Don't hold us to that. Remember, we tried to send a lander there too and see how that turned out. There are a quite a few things we want to do with our space program but so far haven't been able to do. The lander was a failure at delivering functional hardware to the surface of Mars, but it was quite the success at delivering ESA functionaries the hard cash right here on the surface of Earth. However,we are certain that we hit it, in other words, the Beagle has crash-landed. "
"And we continue full faith and confidence we can deliver other "successes" like that in the near to long term future. And if we never hit a another space rock with our hardware...we are sure that...we fell confident in the utmost we CAN start the program. We CAN spend every Euro budgeted for the program and then some. We might even be able to build some nice looking hardware that we'll proudly put the ESA logo on and blow it up trying to put it in orbit. Optimistically, a few tries later we'll promptly smash one onto the surface of the moon and later, within say, five to ten years, if ever, later, we'll smash a similar model on mars. But put a living human being on the Moon or Mars? We wouldn't dare try that, really, I just don't see it. Seriously, let me see if I can name all the European Space explorers to go into orbit onboard ESA built space craft......hmm...yes.. no... he was onboard a shuttle......and then there was....no...he was on a Soyuz.....aha..yes...now I remember. Yep, nobody, zippo, nada. We want to really, really bad, but it seems we won't to just as badly. We think it is technically feasible to conduct a failed mission on the moon between 2020 and 2025 and then send a similarly fated mission to Mars between 2030 and 2035. Honestly though, we just couldn't let the American president Bush's unilateral Moon-Mars space speech go unanswered. We have a space program too. remember?' said Francko Nogo-nogo, project manager of the ESA’s fledgling Argh-Ruh-Roh space exploration program.
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